THE CAVE

THE CAVE
By Ken Leicht

Back in Cold War Russia, a small group of greedy individuals go deep into the Carpathian Mountain in search of an abandoned cave which may contain riches. When they get to the cave’s mouth, they find that a church has been built over it to keep people out or to keep whatever in. With a little dynamite, they gain entrance to the cave. They also lock themselves in. It becomes immediately apparent that they are not alone in the dark.

Cut to the present day where archeologist Dr. Nicolai is digging up the ruined church and discovering the cave beneath. Seeing that it is filled with water, he calls in a special underwater cave diving unit to help find out what lurks beneath. Jack (Cole Hauser), his brother Tyler and their crew of young hunky divers set out to explore the caves below.
Soon afterwards they become trapped below and like the explorers from 30 years ago, they also realize that they are not alone. It then becomes a race to find a way out before the creatures below get to them.

An interesting setup for a monster film; but once it gets rolling it’s never exciting or scary enough. Given how menacing the monsters are, a little scarier atmosphere would have helped. Those caves are awfully well lit. And I could have used some more blood. I guess we have the PG-13 rating to thank for that one.

As for the characters, nobody is really of interest. The only thing approaching a star is Piper Pirabo as the sexy climber Charlie. Cole Hauser, who seems to be trying to be the next Thomas Jane, is only somewhat effective as a lead. Given what happens to his character, he should have been more intense. Especially since all of the characters are bland Baywatch types, even the usually semi-interesting Morris Chestnut.

Come to think of it, the film itself suffers the same problem. What should have been “pulse pounding” as the clichéd action film ads would say, is instead rather un-involving. You can barely get interested enough to wait for characters to be killed off. And since its PG-13, when they do die, it’s hardly worth paying attention to when the killings happen.

If you can’t get off on the slaughter, then you’re left looking for plot. As the origin of the monsters is allegedly a virus, why do the creatures take the form that they do and why do they do what they do? Where do they come from and why? These are questions you wouldn’t usually bother with in a film like this but since most of the horror movie thrills have been anesthetized by the filmmakers, gaping logic or plot holes just stare you right in the face. I guess the only way to like this film is as dumb fun. Maybe when it pops up on late night cable and you’re on your ninth beer, maybe there’ll be some entertainment in it for you. That’s pretty much the level of entertainment I got out of it, except that I paid full price.