The long awaited interview
with Edwin “Hitchhiker” Neal, questions by Aine,
interview conducted by Larra
Do you prefer
popsicles, pop tarts, or popcorn?
Actually, popcorn, because
popcorn used to be used as currency in the south sea islands
where it was taken by boat. You could buy slaves, and large
rafts with popcorn, and it was later worn as clothing in Lithuania
by the warriors because they couldn’t make any fabric.
Popcorn is one of the most useful things in the entire world.
It was also used when they could not make confetti because the
government banned certain plastics. And it was used in boxes
for packing, so things wouldn’t break. What happened was,
large rats, once they found out, they would eat the whole box
and the popcorn and just leave the object sitting in the case,
and it was horrible. It didn’t work, so I don’t
eat popcorn at all anymore, next question.
What’s
your favorite song?
Well actually, I like all
kinds of music so it’s difficult to choose. A favorite
song has to be answered in terms of what mood you’re in.
If you’re in a real dark mood, then you’ll like
something like Oh Susanna, and if you’re in a real happy
mood then you’ll like something like Handle’s Messiah.
On
the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, who do you think fell the
most times?
That would have been the
producer, because he was constantly drunk; a lot of Cuervo and
hard drugs and things like that, so we were always picking him
up. We asked him not to fall so much because what was happening
was the thud in the background was being picked up by the microphones.
We would be in the middle of the scene and going like, “Well,
I think there’s a… (Thud)…what the hell was
that?” Oh, that was him falling again. Get him up; he’s
ruining the scenery!
Tell me your
favorite stalker story.
I was once followed by two
midget nuns all the way from La Jolla, California to New Jersey.
I was on a motor bike at the time, and they were on a new Honda,
and they were circling me like buzzards. I finally had to stop
and come to terms with them, which I did, but unfortunately
that was caught on film by Troma films, and is one of their
best sellers to date.
Do your kids
love all the voices that you do…
Actually, this is the truth.
My kids, all through elementary school, and through junior high,
they would take me to show and tell. They always thought it
was great fun. People would ask them, “What are you bringing
for show and tell?” And they would say, “my dad.”
And they’d ask, “Well why are you bringing your
dad?” And they’d go, “You’ll see.”
So they’d bring me in and say, “You can ask my dad
to do the voice of anything.” It was like stump the actor,
they’d say to do the voice of a fish and I’d say
(in an underwater voice) “Hi, I am a tuna.” Or they’d
say to do an old man, so I’d do an old man voice, and
so it was a lot of fun. Then the teacher would ask, “Can
you come back three days a week?” And I was like, “No!”
A gig at kindergarten.
Yeah, now appearing in kindergarten,
Ed Neal! Oh, but it was a lot of fun.
Ok, can you
tell me a little bit about Zombiegeddon.
Zombiegeddon was so much
fun! We went out to the middle of Kansas with all these whackos
and the cast was absolutely amazing. We had, have you seen the
rundown of the cast? I would have paid to be with these people;
it was big fun! They had taken over this little junior college
dorm and everyone was in a dorm; it was bad. But I got to play
GOD, which is kind of a satirical thing. But my children, upon
seeing this, went “Oh boy, there’s no living with
him now.”
Have you seen the
TCM remake?
The latest one?
Yes.
You mean the 90210 CGI version.
Yeah, I think that about covers it.
What do you
think it is about you that makes you such a great psycho?
The fact that I’m
psychotic comes to mind quickly. Do what you do well as my grandmother
once said.
Didn’t
you just love Jim Siedow?
Jim Siedow, was seriously,
one of THE greatest human beings. There will not be another
around like him for quite awhile. He was a warm, gently, caring,
loving, very talented man. He did a tremendous amount of stage
work, great film work, he was amazing. He was so great to work
with on the set because there was nothing he wouldn’t
try, and nothing he wouldn’t do. He’s one of the
most patient actor’s I’ve ever worked with. He’s
the kind of guy, as they say in my business, that you’d
take a cut in pay to work with, which is the greatest compliment
in my business. And for Jim, I would have taken a cut in pay.
Gnomes, good
or evil?
Good. I have several at
my house, they do the dishes.
Do you like
Play-Doh?
I do like Play-Doh. When
I go to Vegas I take a great deal of play dough, I usually play
the slots and…oh wait, you meant. (Goes into Italian gangster
accent) “I’m sorry, you know what I thought you
said, you said play dough, that was what play dough is to me,
you know what I’m sayin’ over here? Get outta here.”
During the famous
dinner scene of TCM, how much were you improvising?
A great deal because of
the environment. The temperature was about 112 degrees and they
hadn’t totally mapped the scene out to begin with, so
a great deal of it was improvisation. A great deal of what an
actor does is what’s called improvisation with objects,
and we had objects all over the place, so we were just improvising
left and right, which is what any good film should do because
film is a collaborative effort.
When you’re
on a plane, what do YOU do when you have to fart?
I usually turn to the old
woman next to me and say, “Good God lady!” Which
always seems to work because you know old people. But if there
are no old people around you’re dead, end everybody knows
it’s you.
How many times
on average, per day, would you say you have to pee?
Oh probably, if I’m
in Vegas, about one a day, because you don’t want to leave
the table. But if you’re in a coffee shop, talking to
an insurance salesman then I’d say forty or fifty times
a day.
What’s
your favorite word for poop?
That would be money. That
way you always feel good saying, “Boy, I would like to
have a handful of money.” Nobody knows and it makes everything
ok.
