28 Days Later
By Aine

You have got to be kidding me right? So evil scientists in a lab tie monkeys up and force them to watch lots of violent and crappy television. Somehow, this causes the monkeys to become infected with rage. Again, are you kidding me?! So yes, rage is now a highly contagious virus spread though blood or saliva, like a bite.

Some animal rights activists get the bright idea to free the monkeys and are bitten, thus instantly spreading the “rage” virus to the entire human population; or maybe just England, it’s hard to tell.

Then we cut to some really ugly guy waking up from a coma all alone. We’ve waited for years for some full frontal nudity other than a pair of tits, and this little weenie is what we get?! Shameful!

Naked-man finds some other survivors and they band together seeking yet more survivors while constantly fleeing from the zombies. The only person in this entire pile of crap whom is likable is Irish actor, Brendan Gleeson. Unfortunately, they kill him off. He was better in Braveheart and The General anyway.

The survivors of our merry band find more survivors who happen to be a group of soldiers seeking women so that they can repopulate the human race. Blah blah…lots of zombie action followed by a sappy, happy ending. Next please.